Describe Heaven

    I woke up to the smell of cleaning products and vomit. I sat straight in the chair I’d fallen asleep in and stared at my mother lying in the most depressing hospital bed I’ve ever seen. She was pale and weak. She had some grey leftover vomit on her chin and the bucket on her lap was almost filled. I stood up to press the button for the nurse and put my hand on my mother’s head. I gently caressed the last tufts of hair she had left to comfort her.
    The petit nurse came in and cleaned up my mother. I could tell by the way my mother was looking at me she was embarrassed and morose. The little blonde nurse left the room and my mother’s tears started to fall. She put her frail hands over her face and sobbed. The sound of my mother in such agony was heart breaking.
    I scooted my chair closer to her bed and took her hands away from her face to hold. I’d ask her what’s wrong but that would be a really stupid and insensitive thing to ask a woman dying of medulloblastoma.
    My mother’s swollen blue eyes connected with mine. “I’m so scared, Fran. I’m so scared.” She whispered in a barely audible volume.
    I knew she was talking about dying. She is scared of dying like most people. I finally began to crack when the first tear ran down my cheek. “You don’t have to be scared, mom. You’ll be okay, I’m so sure of that. You’ve done well all your life and you’re one of the nicest people I know. You’re going somewhere great. You’ll see me every day and you will feel so amazing and peaceful after all of this. Think of the best day of your life. You can relive that over and over again and you will be happier after each time. I know it’s hard not knowing exactly what you’re getting into but I hope it comforts you that you’re getting into something beautiful. I love you so much, mommy. Please don’t be scared.”